Are you really trying hard to find love? What have you actually done to attract the man of your dream? It’s time to get real about what you are doing in love…

WHAT YOU WILL LEARN:

– Getting real with yourself

– How you may be lying to yourself

– What to do to fix that

READY TO CHANGE YOUR LOVE LIFE FOR THE BETTER, FOREVER?

If you’re ready for the first step towards major transformation & true love at last, head over to https://singletosoulmate.com/call to book a FREE 1-on-1 call with Lara herself. She’ll assess exactly what’s been holding you back in love, how to get what you REALLY want, and if or how we can help you get it as quickly as possible.

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Episode Transcription Start —>
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Speaker1: [00:00:03] Hello and welcome to single The Soulmate Podcast where we help you, the love warrior or love word to be to go from single to with your soulmate. Living the life of your dreams. If something matters to you, but you lie to yourself about the fact that it matters at all. And then you take the actions of someone who it doesn’t really matter. Then you’re. You’re living a lie. Your very existence is a lie. And it is virtually impossible to build a healthy relationship with yourself, a self loving, self respecting relationship when you are busy lying to yourself. Now, we talked about how I talked about how like we all have things that we wish were different and better. And so we tell ourselves little lies that are basically just procrastination and, and stuff like that. And, but it doesn’t really matter that much, you know. And so I’ll give you an example. So I’ve had quite a bit of neck and back injuries because of car accidents, football, a lot of football and just mainly those, those two things right there. And so as my pain in my back was getting slowly, worse and worse and worse, I kept doing something, going to this one particular chiropractor that was doing a particular thing and trying different things. That was basically just kind of patching things up momentarily, but wasn’t really changing the trajectory.

Speaker1: [00:01:44] It wasn’t like changing the direction that I was going. It was basically just a deteriorating situation that wasn’t getting any better. Did I want it to get better? Yes. Was I in pain when it was when it when I had flare ups and stuff? Yes. Did I complain about how much pain I was in? Yes. Did I feel like it was right that I was having so much pain? No. Did I even question like what the heck is going on? Yes, I did. Did I read a few things and watch some YouTube videos? Yes, I did that. And there’s nothing against YouTube videos or listen to podcasts or whatever, read some books, things like that. But what I mostly did was complain and kind of like feel sorry for myself. That’s mostly what I did now. I did little things that were little changes and stuff like that, but I said, You know, I’ve got a herniated disc. What can you expect? I’m over 50. What can you expect? You know, that’s the way life is now. And, you know, so much sitting and you know, I’m not so athletic anymore and all of that stuff, so I’m not telling you all this stuff. So you can, you know, feel bad for me about my back. I’m illustrating a point of how human how like human beings operate. Because I’m going to be talking about how you operate.

Speaker1: [00:03:13] And I know you’re going to be thinking, no, no, no, you’re not talking about me. You’re talking about other people. Or you may be thinking, see, you’re saying I’m a bad person. I’m not saying you’re a bad person. I’m just like you. This is how we operate. But then there came a point where I just got so fucking fed up with the way the situation was, and I got tired of hearing my own bullshit. I got tired of my whining about this situation when I wasn’t doing anything major to change it. And I hadn’t made a decision. That I just wasn’t going to live like this anymore. Because I could see, look, if I’m 52 now and this is what’s happening, I’m having trouble moving and doing doing things that I used to do. And I’m in so much pain and the flare up of pain could happen. And so the flare up, I mean, it’s like the tail end of a fantastic. Like heart opening vacation that we had back to the Dominican Republic, which was where my father grew up. My my my family background is Dominican. I went back there to see the with family members, my aunt and her family and Laura and Isabel. Of course, my my wife and daughter. I went back there to. To visit the the final resting place of my my father, who passed away several years ago.

Speaker1: [00:04:48] And he wanted to be buried in his homeland. And so I went back to visit that to go to different places, to visit family members. And the final the end of that vacation was ruined by I had a flare up of my my back. And so for the last like three days, I couldn’t barely leave the hotel room. I had to lay down in a certain way. It was miserable. And then we were going to the next leg of our journey was in Miami, Florida, visiting some friends of LA the whole week there it was basically trying to find treatment. I found this great chiropractor helped me get on my feet. But basically there was a bunch of stuff that we wanted to do in Miami we couldn’t do, and I just got so fed up with that. And I and I made a decision that I was not going to live like that anymore. And then once I made the decision, I’m just not going to frickin live like this anymore. Then things started to change, not because magically my back up better, but then I started to look for opportunities to change things. And this all ties in with honesty because I wasn’t being honest with myself about how miserable I was. I wasn’t being honest with myself about how much pain I was in, and I wasn’t being honest with myself about how afraid for my future I was.

Speaker1: [00:06:05] But once I did, it then sparked me to take action. Now, what does this have to do with you? Most of the time, women that are single far longer than they want to be and are trying different things to meet a great guy. To. You know, to to have things go differently. To have things go differently, to not be lied to, to not be strung along, to not be invisible. You’re doing you want it to be different, but you’re not being honest with yourself. About how much pain you’re in. About how afraid for your future you are. About how frustrated you are. And that lack of honesty gets covered up with a lot of coping mechanisms. Again, this is how human beings operate and it’s how I operate, how you operate, how you’re operated, how all of our clients that you see, our success stories, this is all how they operated at one time, because this is the way human beings work. Not because you’re a bad person, just because you’re a human being. And this is the way we work. You cover it up with sad spending retail therapy, so you’re blowing through money just because you’re in pain inside. Not that your life isn’t great, you know, not that you don’t have awesome things going on.

Speaker1: [00:07:39] Friends, family members, kids, maybe whatever. Not that you don’t career, house finances. Not that those things aren’t good or even great. But inside there’s a pain. Inside there’s a frustration. Inside there’s a fear and inside there’s a sadness that this may be your life. And there’s inside a fear that maybe there’s something wrong with you. That you’re never going to figure this out. And that fear, that reality gets often covered up. No, no, no. I’m fine. I’m all right. I’ll find somebody someday. You know, I’m just waiting on. On God to bless me. Look. God helps those who help themselves. You know, God can bring a horse to water, but can’t make them drink all of those things. Right. And so. Honesty with yourself about what really matters. That is a foundation and that is a decision. So when I made that decision about my health, it opened my eyes to new possibilities. And I literally hadn’t thought before of changing chiropractors to go to a chiropractor that has a completely different approach, because I was already with one of the best chiropractors in the whole San Francisco Bay area who knew his stuff and had helped me before he had helped me go up from like when I first went to him was terrible. Help me go up.

Speaker1: [00:09:17] And then it just it kind of plateaued and then it started sliding back and there was nothing he could do about it. And does that mean that that the information or the treatment that I got wasn’t good? No, it was good, but it wasn’t good for me and where I was and where I wanted to go. And I had to get honest. And it was uncomfortable to start looking for a different chiropractor. I started to have to do certain things that I just didn’t want to do before, because in order for things to change, things have to change. And so with a new with new treatment, totally different than what I’d done before, with different actions that I had to take, with a different mindset, I got out of this situation where I’m just going down and down and down and having flare ups, and now it’s going up and up and up. I’m having minimal flare ups and even when I do have flare ups, it’s it’s minimal compared to what it was before. Like, it doesn’t stop my activity. It’s just like, Oh, that’s painful. All right, I got to do my certain exercises that are specifically tailored to me, and I got to do my I got to go back for treatment from the person who knows more about how my back is my back, but he knows more about my back and how it functions than I do because I’m not a doctor, you know? And my wife, by the way, Laura is a chiropractor.

Speaker1: [00:10:41] But, you know, sometimes someone is too close and she’s not practicing anymore and hasn’t for like almost 15 years. And so so she’s not like in it every day. So what does this have to do with you? Look, on a daily basis, if you’re not being honest with yourself about how painful it is to still be single. Didn’t you expect that you would be married? Happily married by this time. If you try to tell yourself that it’s fine, when it’s not fine, you’re just lying to yourself. Now, a lot of times people tie in together, beating yourself up with being honest. But I’m not saying beat yourself up. I’m just saying be honest. A lot of times people tie in together that if if, if I suggest what you’re doing isn’t working, it’s somehow I’ve insulted your intelligence or said you’re a bad person. No, no, I’m just looking at the facts, and you need to look at the facts, too, right? If you’re not being honest with yourself about the fact that what you’re doing, the things that you’re doing, maybe they might have worked before, but they’re not working now. Then you’re living a lie with yourself and trying to create a life filled with integrity and honesty and truth on the foundation of a lie is just not going to work.

Speaker1: [00:12:14] Hey, thanks for tuning into today’s episode. If you’re a single professional woman who wants your success in your love life to match your success in your career, and you’re looking to get crystal clear right now about why true love hasn’t been knocking on your door and how to have that happen sooner rather than later. Like, not literally though, that would be weird, but I hope you know what I’m saying. Anyway, you’re going to want a book, a call, a love breakthrough clarity call right now with my dear wife, Dr. Laura. Yes. Lara herself will get on the phone or Skype with you one on one to assess exactly what’s been holding you back and love what it is you really want and how to get there as quickly as possible. Just go to single to soulmate dot com forward slash call to book a call that single day soulmate dot com forward slash call for free love breakthrough clarity call that is for you if and only if you’re a single professional woman who is as serious about her love life right now as you’ve been about getting your degree or your career success. So again, that’s single soulmate dot com forward slash call to book your life changing love breakthrough clarity call right away.

Episode Transcription End —>

Hope you enjoyed this episode of Single to Soulmate! If you want to learn more about Johnny and Lara or want to start your own soulmate journey, go to johnnyandlara.com.