There are lies you might be telling yourself that are affecting your love life. Do you know what they are? What do you think got them in your mind in the first place?

WHAT YOU WILL LEARN:

– Some common lies single women tell themselves

– The truth to this lies

– What you can do about them

READY TO MAKE A DRAMATIC CHANGE IN YOUR LOVE LIFE?

If you are ready to take action and control over your love life to find the man of your dreams go to http://bit.ly/SingleToSoulmate-Call to book a FREE call with one of our Love Breakthrough Specialists to assess exactly what’s been holding you back in love, what is it you REALLY want, and how to get there as quickly as possible.

Want to know your Love Pattern? After over 15 years of helping women find their soulmate, we have identified 5 different Love Patterns, each with different characteristics that keep you from finding true love. You can find what your love pattern is and how to overcome it by taking our quiz. Just go to http://bit.ly/STS-LovePatternQuiz

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Episode Transcription Start —>
S5EP31

Speaker1: [00:00:03] Hello and welcome to single The Soulmate Podcast where we help you, the love warrior or love word to be to go from single to with your soulmate. Living the life of your dreams.

[00:00:18] Wow. Hello, hello.

Speaker1: [00:00:19] Hello and welcome to this episode of What’s Going On in Your Love Life and What Can Be Done About It. So today I’m going to be talking about the common lies that just are happening so, so much. And these are the common lies that you tell yourself now. There are so many of them. But I want to talk about some of the the the common lies that you tell yourself. It’s not the right time. All men around here want is sex. Coronavirus is the reason why I can’t find anyone. I can’t trust men. They’re all the same. And a really, really big one is I’m to I’m just going to I’m just repeating your word. I’m too fat or old. I need to lose weight. I’m fine. It’s all my fault. So these are a lot of the common lies. And there’s so, so many of them. These are some of the big ones, though, that I’ve I’ve written down here. I’m fine. It’s all my fault or it’s not the right time, whether it be because of coronavirus or something else. And I want to speak to this because as as the title suggests, these are lies that we tell ourselves. And the truth is that you probably know that on some level, that it’s a lie that you’re telling yourself and you’ve gotten really good at kind of convincing yourself that it’s it it’s kind of true or something like that.

Speaker1: [00:02:00] Like a variant of of I’m fine is it’s not that bad, you know, being single and that type of thing. Another one is and this is for a single moms, I can’t focus on my love life. I have to focus on my kids. So I’m going to start there because this is a common lie that single moms tell themselves that almost everyone around them supports them with. Because here’s the thing. The thought process is either I am focusing on my kids and giving them all they want and need, right? Or I’m going out with some schmuck who’s taking me away from being the great mom that I am. And here’s the thing that the reason why a lot of people around you will support you in that if you’re a single mom and you’re like, Hey, I’m not dating now because I’m just focusing on my kids is because you and them have swallowed a different lie, which is it’s simply impossible to find something other than these type of schmucks who would take you away from your kids and that the kids don’t need to have a father. And the truth is, if you could wave a magic wand and have an awesome man that you loved and who loved you and who would be a great role model for your kids, a man who they looked up to, respected and stuff like that with their life be better with a husband and father in the home to father them stepfather or would they be better off without such a person? So if you acknowledge that they would be better off with such a person, right? Committed monogamous marriage where he loves being a stepfather, all of that stuff.

Speaker1: [00:04:04] If you acknowledge that they would be better off with that in their life, with that that relationship in their life, then it’s not a matter of doing this for your kids because you’ve just acknowledged that they would be better off with someone like that in their life, in your life. Then it becomes an issue of I’m choosing to not date, not focus on my love life because I’m scared of picking the wrong person again and I don’t know how to pick the right person. So better to have nobody than the wrong person. So I agree with you that it’s better to have nobody than to have the wrong person. But what you’re not allowing yourself, I’m talking to you as a single mom, which are not allowing yourself to recognize is that there is a option number three, a door number three, which is what if you could learn how to pick the right person so that you could have that? And here’s the thing that you have to really just be honest with yourself about if the reason. Why you are not going for your dreams is because you are scared and you don’t know how.

Speaker1: [00:05:25] Then what are you teaching your kids? You’re teaching your kids if you’re scared and you don’t know how to go for your dreams. To get your ideal. Don’t do it. Just stop. And you want to ask yourself, is this the message that I want to be giving to my kids? Because the reality is kids don’t do what we say. They do what we do. Right. You’re the role model for them. So if they see when you’re scared and you don’t know how, the way to deal with that is to shrink back and not go for it. That’s what they’re going to learn. Should they try the tuba? And even though they never had any experience with it, but they’d like to be in band, but they think it would be kind of cool. No, they shouldn’t. Why? Because they’re scared and they don’t know how. And they just learn from you if you’re scared and you don’t know how. Don’t do it. Should I try out for Little League? No. Why? Because they learn from you. Scared and don’t know how. When they get to. To college age. Should I start my own business? Should I go to this university? Not if I’m scared. And I don’t know how. Know why? Because they learn from you when they’re in their twenties and they’re, like, trying to go for their dreams. Should they do that? Know why? Because they learned early on.

Speaker1: [00:06:34] If they’re scared and they don’t know how, don’t do it. So that’s a common lie that most of society I’ve done a couple of episodes about this, specifically going more into detail, but most of the time single moms use their kids as a shield when they she really should be using them as as fuel for their dreams. Like the reason why to go for your dreams and learn how and and break through that fear of picking somebody wrong is is because your kids would benefit more from having a father in the home. Because, look, mothers can’t father and fathers can’t mother. And so a mom can give them love and protection and keep a roof over their head and stuff like that. But what you can’t do is father them and having a man, a good man, not just any man. Nobody said just any man having a good man in the home to be their father is going to be better, right? Is it going to be better to have a schmuck guy then? No. Guy, no. But that’s not what we’re talking about. So if the reason why you’re not going for your dreams of of soulmate love is because you’re afraid is simply means you don’t know how. So that’s a common lie. So one of the common lies is coronavirus is the reason why. And the reason why that’s a lie is that, you know, that was your love life dramatically different and better six months ago.

Speaker1: [00:08:03] Were you like just choosing between all these great high quality guys and then all of a sudden they all dried up because of coronavirus? No. You want to look at the trajectory of where you’re going and if the trajectory meaning the the whatever. I don’t know what another word for trajectory is. If the trajectory isn’t what you want, then then you got to be honest with yourself. It’s not coronavirus. It’s just that’s the way things were going. Now, if six months ago you had your pick of awesome high quality guys and then they all poof, disappeared when the coronavirus and the lockdown and all that stuff came. Okay, then maybe that is. But in most cases that’s not the case. Six months ago, your love life was the same as it is today, which is either nonexistent or no good men in sight. And then the good men that do come inside. You have no idea how to choose, how to tell. Look, the slick stir and the real guy both seem to say the same things. So if you can’t discern who’s telling the truth and who’s not, that’s a matter of you simply not knowing. That’s not a matter of coronavirus or whatever other thing is, because once coronavirus is done, there’ll be some other thing that will suggest that it’s not the right time. I’m fine now. I did another episode here about honesty and being honest with yourself.

Speaker1: [00:09:25] And so if that’s a common lie that you’ve told yourself, I really encourage you to check out the the honesty episode where I really went delve deeply into that and offer you some some new insights about being honest and why honesty really matters first and foremost with you. But let’s talk about this big one. It’s all my fault. The reason why I broke up with the last guy, it’s all my fault. By the way, if you’re joining me here live, put a comment on here where you’re joining from. If you’re watching me on replay, put a comment on. Just say replay and where you watching me from? And then, of course, if you have any questions, go ahead and ask me here. So let’s talk about this thing. It’s all my fault. So this is a feeling that a lot of women have. And part of the reason is because you have been encouraged to think that you basically just have to do the dance the right way for the guy to pick you. And in our community, we’re all about your and. Empowerment. And so what that means is that you don’t have to perform for him. You have to learn how to not only see yourself as the prize, but to actually be the prize. And those are light years away from each other because a lot of women will say that they are the prize, but they’re beingness and their actions, everything from the words you use or don’t use the things that you say and don’t say the way you move in your body, the jokes that you tell, the way you look at a man, all of that, your body language, all of that suggests and gives much more clarity to the guy of whether you are the prize or not.

Speaker1: [00:11:18] Most women remember and not remember. Maybe, you know, maybe you don’t know. Actual words that you say are less than 10% of the communication that you’re getting across. So people are picking up 90% from word things other than your words. Again, your cadence, your body language, the way you move, the things you say and don’t say where your eyes go. All of that stuff reveals what’s going on inside, even though your words may be saying one thing or the other. So while a lot of women will say, Yes, I’m the prize and all that stuff, and I get manicure, pedicures or whatever. That’s not the essence that you’re giving across, right? If you’re giving across anything other than I am the prize in a feminine, radiant way that is effortless and natural, then he’s getting the clear message that he is the prize and that you have to perform properly for him in order for him to pick you. All of that is conveyed non-verbally, and all of that has to do with what’s going on inside.

Speaker1: [00:12:27] And that’s where I want to talk about this idea of it’s all my fault, right? So because you have this message from society of you as a woman, you have to perform a certain way in order for him to be happy with you. In order for him to pick you. In order for him to. Want to commit to you. You have to basically perform properly. You have to be a certain weight, you have to be a certain age, all of this type of stuff. This is the message that you’re getting from society. So when you hear a message of like our message, which is about women’s empowerment and you hear us talk about taking responsibility, you actually translate that into your mind of I’m getting blamed again very often. I just had an exchange with someone the other day in Facebook Messenger about how she was sent first in comments, and then it moved to Facebook Messenger where she thought that there was victim blaming going on because the larger society does that to you women. The reason why you don’t have this, that and the other is you haven’t behave properly or, you know, you have the extra £10 or whatever or £20 or whatever the thing is. Right? So it’s hard for someone to hear responsibility, taking responsibility for what you can and not filter it through society’s lens of victim and blame, like blaming the victim or victim shaming and blaming the victim and stuff like that.

Speaker1: [00:14:13] And so anyway, I had this exchange and she actually ended up apologizing because she realized that she was basically just taking out her frustration about her poor choices in men and the impact that it’s had on her life, on her ability to have children. She’s getting up there in age. She’s now afraid that she can’t have children. And because society has told her, Oh, if you wore a different dress or you lost some weight, or you learn how to say this certain line and look at them a certain way and blink three times and look at them, not straight on, but kind of a little kiddy corner thing. All of this type of tips, tricks and techniques there really don’t do anything to shift the underlying feeling of Do you feel like the prize or not? Because he’s going to get from you one or two, one of two messages. You’re either woman who he can possibly build a life with or you’re in the meantime woman So I’m going to have some fun with rolling the hay, you know, maybe even call you his girlfriend and stuff like that until the woman that he really wants comes along. That’s going to be a woman who knows she is the pride. If he’s a high quality guy, if he’s a schmuck, then he’s going to go out with anybody.

Speaker1: [00:15:24] You not at your best, you at your best. He’s going to go out with anybody he can. Right. I’m talking about a high quality, commitment minded, marriage minded man who you want to build a family with, who you want to possibly be, the father of your child or children who you want to bring home to your mother, who you want to show off to your friends. That man knows that he is kind of like in demand and he wants a woman who knows that she is in demand. But if you are so used to doing that dance and stuff like that, then you’re never going to have the energy of that effortless feminine radiance that knows that she is the prize. This is why we start there with within our programs of becoming your own soulmate first so that you know that. But here’s here’s the thing I want you to understand. Saying that you have some responsibility over the guys that you have chosen and the relationships that you have created isn’t saying it’s all your fault. It’s simply saying that you have some responsibility. And here’s the thing. Once you embrace that, you actually are more empowered because, look, if the reason why you had a guy lie to you, cheat on you, stringing you along for two, three, five, ten years is because he is a schmuck and he and you have no responsibility whatsoever.

Speaker1: [00:16:55] Then what can you do with that? There’s nothing you can do. There’s nowhere you can go with that. You can just hope that the next guy is better. That’s no power. That’s no power. But once you realize that you do have some responsibility. You picked this guy. You didn’t you didn’t even know how to make a decision about who to get into a relationship and who not to. You couldn’t see the red flags. You didn’t even know what a green flag was like. Meaning, what are the signs? That I should go for it? You had no concept of of that. And here’s another reason why it is not your fault, is that you simply didn’t have the knowledge, the information and the strategy to make better choices. You simply didn’t have that. Now, if you think that all you need is more knowledge and information, then you don’t understand how recipes work. Let me let me explain to you. If you have a recipe for, let’s say, a cake. Right, and there’s flour and there’s sugars, there’s egg or egg replacer, whatever you’re putting in there. Right. You know that certain recipes, you need to put the sugar in and then you need to blend it in the hot water and stuff like that. And then you’ve got to put this other thing in and then this other thing. Now, if you put the sugar in last, after all this stuff is is in and you don’t put it in the hot water and blend it and stuff like that.

Speaker1: [00:18:29] You have the ingredients, but it won’t be right. Right. It’ll like the sugar will all granulated and it won’t actually blend in and you won’t have an even sweetness. You’ll have these little right. And if you decide, you know what, I have all the ingredients, but the context, meaning the oven, I don’t really want to heat up my oven. It’s a really hot day today. I think I’m just going to put it in my toaster oven because a little smaller and it’s more convenient and uses less energy. It’s a little cheaper, you know, to run my toaster oven. So you’re going to put all your cake in the toaster oven? It’s not going to bake. Why? Because the context, the environment is not right. So let’s talk about your environment, your team, time, effort, attention and money. So what are those things? Where is your individual team, your influence coming from? Where is your time going? Where’s your effort going? Where’s your attention going and where’s your money going? That has a lot to do with how you actually process the knowledge, information and strategy that you do have. So if you have certain information but it’s all mish mashed, it’s like putting the the baking ingredients in the toaster oven. You get all the ingredients even if you mix them right, but you put them in the toaster oven, that’s not going to work unless it’s like an Easy-Bake Oven and it’s like a little simple thing like that.

Speaker1: [00:19:54] But here’s another thing that’s even more powerful. Your peer group, who is around you, who is speaking into your life? One of the reasons why all of our advanced programs are in a community setting is because this is how human beings are wired. You actually learn more and learn faster when you are in a peer group of those who are going in the direction that you’re going. Think about why people smoke. Almost everybody that smokes says they started because their friends were starting, and it just goes around and around and around. There have been studies that show that if you put a it’s one particular study I’m thinking of. If you put one person in a room with another, you have like a test subject in a room with another person who’s like part of the experiment. And you’re both looking at a very simple thing. Which one of these lines are longer than the other? Simple, right. It’s obvious. You just look at that. So one person says this, one person says that, stuff like that. But if you put one person who’s the test subject in a room with four other people who are part of the experiment and you look at the the the the test, which of the are these lines one longer than the other or are they the same? And you put it where two lines where one is clearly three inches longer than the other, but four people say, yup, those are the same size.

Speaker1: [00:21:32] The one person who’s the test subject because the peer group around says, well, it’s obvious they’re the same size. The person who is in who can see with her own eyes that one is three inches longer than the other will actually. And this is research based will will actually say, yeah, I guess, you know, I must be seeing it wrong. I guess they are the same because everybody else is saying. Now, what does that have to do with you? Your peer group has a lot to do with what you do with the knowledge, information and strategy that you do have. Never mind whether the knowledge, information and strategy that you have is wrong or not. But let’s say you did have the right knowledge, information and strategy. It’s like having the right ingredients. But then you put it in the context of a toaster oven instead of a regular oven. It’s still not going to bake up. Never mind if you don’t have the right information, the right strategy, or the right knowledge, because then there’s no shot that you’re going to actually get it right and be able to be successful. All of that speaks to It’s not your fault because the knowledge, information and strategy that you had was probably missing things.

Speaker1: [00:22:49] Right. It’s like you’re baking a cake, but you forgot to put sugar in it. Or you forgot to put a binding agent like a like a eggs or egg replacer or something like that. You can want to have a great cake. You can desire to have a great cake. You can wish you have a great cake. You can put up on your vision board. I’m the cake master, but that cake is not going to come out good. It’s just not because you just don’t have the right ingredients for that. And it doesn’t matter how much you wish for it, want for it, hope for it or anything like that. You simply don’t have that. But if you have the right ingredients, you put them in the wrong order. Remember I talked about you put the sugar in first with the hot water, you blend it, now it’s going to dissipate. And then you when you put it in the rest of the thing, it’s going to be fine. But if you put it in last in some way, it’s going to granularly, it’s not going to be right, all this type of stuff, right? Or maybe you decide, you know what, I, I, I know they said to put the, the frosting on the cake at the end, but I really like frosting. So what I’m going to do is before I put the cake in the oven, I’m going to put all the frosting I want and then I’m going to put it in the oven.

Speaker1: [00:24:00] Look, you can have a great does that. My intuition tells you all of that stuff. It’s the wrong recipe in the wrong order. This is why having information alone isn’t doing it for you. It’s not your fault. Now information is free. You can go to YouTube, podcasts, Google, search, whatever information is virtually free. So like when we walk our clients through stuff, it’s not just about the information, although very often they simply have never heard these things before. But it’s also what information to place. In what order? When should I be texting him? When should I be talking to him on the phone? When should I be meeting him? Excuse me for a zoom date? When should I be meeting him for a live and in-person date? How fast should we go? All of these types of things. That’s like the ingredients that are part of the whole process. Now, in reality, this is more than just baking a cake. There’s like a whole five course meal with a cake. So there’s a lot of different pieces of information to apply at different times, and you want to apply them at the right time, in the right order. But the idea here is that I want you to get that whatever you have done in the past, it is not your fault.

Speaker1: [00:25:23] However, it is your responsibility because of the knowledge, information and strategy that you have or haven’t had to apply or not apply in the way that you best knew how, based on your time, effort, attention, money, and your peer group, which is incredibly influential on you. I did another episode where I talked here about where are you going to be in 3 to 5 years? Definitely check that one out because where you’re going to be in 3 to 5 years has a lot to do with one factor, and that is who’s around you, who’s speaking into your life. And I explain that fully in that particular episode. So responsibility for what you can control becomes scary if you’re trying to have responsibility and control, but not changing anything, right? So you drive a car into the ditch, somehow you manage to get it out of the ditch. You don’t learn anything new about driving. You have no new skills, no new information, no new strategy. And then you drive again and you drive it into the ditch, and then you get the car out somehow, and then you do it again. It’s understandable that you would be then afraid of doing it again because you’re like, Look, clearly what I know how to do is drive the thing into the ditch. In other words, pick the wrong guy. If you do have a decent guy, screw it up.

Speaker1: [00:26:54] You already see that you drive that car into the ditch. So the question is, are you going to go to driving school or are you basically going to sit around and talk to your friends about how terrible it is to be having your car end up in a ditch? Or are you going to ask your friends who also just drove into a ditch how to not drive into a ditch? Or are you going to ask someone who says they know how to not drive your car into a ditch, but they themselves have driven their car into a ditch. All of these things have a lot to do with how excited you are about the empowerment that comes with the fact that you have some responsibility over the relationships that you’ve had in the past. If you’re not doing anything to change your expertise, responsibility, understanding and emotional maturity and all of that, in other words, your knowledge, information, strategy and how it’s applied, then that level of greater responsibility is going to be scary and you’re going to rightfully want to shrink back from that and go back into. Yeah, man. It’s because, you know, all men want is is sex and that kind of thing. You know, guys are losers and stuff like that, you know. But once you recognize that something else could happen, you actually could have things turn out differently. Then the message of, Hey, I have some responsibility is like music to your ears, because that means you can change it.

Speaker1: [00:28:28] Right. If you drove the car into the ditch, but your hands were taped to your shoulders and it just happened to you, what’s your chances of next time it happening again? Well, it could happen again because you have no control. But if your hands are released from being, you know, taped to your shoulders or something like that, and you actually put your hands on the steering wheel of your love life and control what you can control. It changes everything. Nobody is saying that when you put your hands on the steering wheel, that because you become a better driver, that you are not at risk of getting into an accident. It just means that when you have a dangerous situation, you know what to do. We had a client recently who had a fantastic experience at one of those like fast moving date situations online. And she said, Because I’m equipped, I can’t remember her exact words because I have all of these new tools that I never had before. I feel so good that I can go anywhere, that I can go anywhere, I can go to any event, whether it be Zoom or in-person or whatever. I can go to any event because now I have new tools. I have everything that I that I actually need for that. So this is what empowerment is like. It’s like putting your hands on the steering wheel of the car and saying, okay, I’ve learned how to drive better.

Speaker1: [00:30:09] And so now I feel more confident in driving. That doesn’t mean you don’t have to look out for knucklehead drivers and stuff like that. You absolutely still do. However, you now have the skills to navigate away from them. What does that look like in your love life? If you have the skills, if you have if you’re if you have a picking process that makes sense what we call a clear decision making framework, then when you have a disaster coming at you, you can actually navigate away from him instead of getting to a two month or two year or five year relationship with a guy who was not right for you from the start. You simply save yourself time and money and stuff like that. Ask yourself, Look, you’re a mature person. You probably are, I don’t know, 30 to 40 fifties, whatever. But when you were 17 or 18 and your first learning how to drive, wasn’t there a lot more scary stuff out there? Maybe you got into some accidents then that you wouldn’t get into now. Why? Because you’re a better driver, you’re more experienced. Sometimes you learn that in driving school, sometimes you learn from the, you know, school of hard knocks. Well, you know what? When it comes to your love life, do you really want to continue getting into accidents or do you want to go to a driving school that will help you to learn what knowledge and information you actually do need and what you don’t need? There is so much nonsense out there.

Speaker1: [00:31:38] There are dating coaches out there telling you, Here’s what you need to do, need to go on 20 to 30 dates in a month. That’s just like short coffee dates. And then you need to go on 5 to 10 dinner dates in a month. There’s other people that say you should be reaching out to 200 people online, 200 guys online in a month. That’s what you should be doing. Now, look, do those techniques work? They really do. Because here’s the thing. If you’re reaching out to 200 frickin guys in a month, somebody is going to get back to you. And you know what you’re going to say, oh, my God, let me just get with somebody because this is frickin exhausting. We’ve had clients that have gone with these other dating coaches. That’s what they tell us. Like, I still don’t know really how to pick, but I’m like, now dealing with all of these guys, it makes your head spin. It’s confusing. If you are not grounded and you don’t have a clear process for deciding who’s worth your time and who you want to avoid. Getting in front of more people will simply put you in front of more people that are like the people that you’re getting now.

Speaker1: [00:32:52] You’re just going to have more of them. You know, you’re still not going to know how to pick the right guys. You’re still going to be driven by your old your old default mode and default patterns. You’re still not going to be sending out the vibe of I am the prize. You’re still going to be thinking that he’s the prize. You’re just going to have a lot more people to do to deal with. And you’re going to be this is what we hear from from clients exhausted and not going to feel radiant, not going to feel feminine. You’re not going to feel like you’re the prize. You’re going to feel like because you are actively working. Hey, Bethany, you’re going to be actively working to get this guy. You’re going to feel like he’s the prize. You’re chasing after him. Yeah, because you are. So it’s not just having knowledge and information, but there are, again, most of these dating coaches that are giving you those kind of strategies. They’re single themselves, so they know all about dating and they’re their end result is about getting more dates and better dates and stuff like that. And while that definitely comes in along the process, along the journey in like in our community and our advanced programs, that’s not the focus. What is the focus? True love, marriage and family. That’s the focus. That’s the end result.

Speaker1: [00:34:06] So how you date every step of the way is going to be completely, completely different when you when you start out. But anyway, that’s not the point of this. The idea is here is when you hear us talk about you taking responsibility, recognize that that is a world away from blaming you. It’s simply not your fault that you didn’t have the knowledge, the information or the strategy. It’s simply not your fault that your peer group around you was speaking into you and creating an atmosphere that was not conducive to your deepest desires and your hopes and dreams. If you would like to make a shift and change in the knowledge information strategy, the thought process, the decision making process, so that you can go in the direction that you want so that your time, effort, attention and money are going in toward your deepest desires and what you really want so that your peer group around you, that factor that influences your life more than anything else. Because we are tribal being, we are social beings. Then you might want to have a a call with Laura to really have a professional assessment of your situation. Where are you at and where do you want to go? So where you’re at and where you want to go and and how to get there as quickly as possible can give you a clarity that you simply cannot get on your own.

Speaker1: [00:35:42] How do you know that? Because right now you tell me, are you overwhelmed with information? A lot of it that’s competing. In fact, I want you to to comment below. Whether you’re watching live or on replay, do you find that a lot of the information out there from love and dating coaches is conflicting and one person tells you one thing, one person tells you another, because here’s what our clients find is that one of the things that they love about working with us is the clarity that they get about where what to do, what to not do. Working with us actually frees them from hours and hours every week of things that they’re doing because they think they should be doing. And it is taking them away from their dreams. And I can pretty much guarantee you that you’re doing that right now. You’re doing that right now. You’re spending hours and hours and hours per week every single solitary week on things that are taking you away from what you ultimately want. You simply don’t know. I can pretty much guarantee right now that you’re spending money right now on things that are taking you away from what it is that you want, whether it be retail therapy or sad spending or simply paying more for housing insurance, everything else that single people more pay. So the life that you’re living now costs you more, and it’s probably not even the life that you want.

Speaker1: [00:37:08] So if you’re a single woman who is serious about changing her life, who wants to get out of going around and around and around and doing the same thing over and over and is ready to show up and get new knowledge information strategy that actually works. And you’re a woman who is who is recognizing that, look, you you are telling yourself some common lies, but you’re recognizing. I don’t think that that’s true. Whether that be I’m fine. And you get honest with yourself and you just realize, actually, I’m not fine. Not that I’m horrible. My life is terrible and everything is crappy. No, your life is actually really good. But when you’re home alone at night, on a Friday night and you’re alone once again, or you’re taking out the trash or you’re having a change, get up on a ladder and do something, and you’re like, Oh, my God, I wish. I had a man here. Not just any man, but a man who wants to do things for me. Help me, you know, make my life easier. When you’re traveling and you see some great, I don’t know, the Eiffel Tower or Sunset and you’re like, That’s awesome. But it kind of feels empty because I don’t have anybody to share it with. Or you’re just dealing with coronavirus, lockdown, all that, and life is hard and you recognize. It sure would be great to have a partner here.

Speaker1: [00:38:45] Who I could. Who could share the load, right? Who could help you make decisions? Who could do stuff for you? Right. So, again, you’re fine. But some part of you is, like, dying inside. Every day. Every month. You know, Christmas. Oh, she here again by herself. No date for New Year’s Eve, honey. You’re so smart and pretty. Why are you still single? Right. And you just heard that enough? Because it hasn’t just been a few weeks or months. It’s been years. If you’re ready to leave that behind and really take a new direction and really look at what’s been going on and what do you want? Where you at? Where you want to go and you just won’t go one more day going the direction that you’re going because you already know what that’s like. Just look back at the last few years of your life. That’s what the next few years are going to be like unless something changes. What are we talking about? Changing. Having a completely new and different knowledge, information and strategy, a thought process and a decision making process that ends you up in a totally different place. Not because someone just tossed out some random opinions, but because you had expert mentoring, coaching and guidance with a proven plan, a recipe, a roadmap, a system that works if that’s what you want. A recipe, a roadmap, a system that works. A way to save yourself time and meet those hours a week.

Speaker1: [00:40:23] Save yourself money, save yourself heartache. Most importantly, from getting into another relationship with another guy who you can’t tell. Is he telling the truth? Is he like stringing you along and you’re just ready to be done with that? Get a professional love breakthrough assessment. So, so get a professional assessment. And here’s the thing. You want to show up to this appointment ready for your life to change. If you’re just wanting an appointment to have somebody to chit chat with, the appointment is not for you. But if you’re ready for your, you’re just looking for like I want a professional assessment of my situation and what is possible for me. And then, you know what, if you are if it makes sense for you to work with us, if you basically qualify to be a candidate, to have our personal mentorship and coaching and guidance from us, MI Lara and our team, then great. We’ll show you what that looks like. But that’s not for everyone, because the truth is that out of every maybe ten people they call, not that many people get invited to even work with us. Because we only want what’s best for you. And if what’s best for you is to get some other resource, we’ll refer you to that. But we don’t want to get on the phone with people for whom they’re just. I don’t know. Something to do on a Tuesday afternoon.

Speaker1: [00:41:58] That’s going to be a waste of your time. And honestly, it’s going to be a waste of our time because Laura is going to show up ready for you, to give you a professional assessment of what’s going on, and then a professional assessment of what is the roadmap going forward. Because you want a new roadmap and you want to get started on it today. If that’s what you want, go to Johnny and Larcom Forward Slash Apply and book an appointment. Fill out the short history and goals. And I’ll tell you, if you don’t fill out that form, your appointment is going to be cancelled because in order for her to serve you best, she really needs to be able to see what’s been going on with you, what it is that you want, that kind of thing. And it’s only for you if you feel like, Look, this is the area of my life that is causing me the most pain and I want to solve it and deal with it right now, if you’re just like, you know, if you feel like it’s the same as just getting another YouTube video, then nothing against YouTube videos. We have YouTube videos, but if you’re just looking for another tip, probably should just buy a book. You can’t ask a book a question. You can’t figure out whether the the book is telling you what’s appropriate for you.

Speaker1: [00:43:18] But, you know, that’s probably where you want to go. But if you want to have a customized plan for what makes sense for you, then why not get a professional assessment of what’s going on? Maybe we can help you. Maybe we can’t. We actually don’t know. But what I do know is that the woman that worked with us best are at a place where they’re ready to change their life because they want different and better. They want true love, marriage and family. If that’s what you want, go to Johnny and Laura. Come forward, slash, apply and apply for a breakthrough assessment. And let’s see if or how we can help you turn your life around and and get where you want to go and stop driving your car into the ditch. All right. So thanks for joining me today. And I hope you have a beautiful and blessed rest of the day or night, depending on when you’re watching this. Bye for now. Hey, I hope you enjoyed today’s episode. And if you did enjoy it, please leave us a review on whatever your favorite podcast platform is. Reviews. Let other women know that we exist, and it’s a little bit of like a paying it forward thing. So if you’re enjoying it, getting a lot out of it, learning that, we’d love to hear from you and a review. And we have tons of five star reviews. We’d love to have your five star review or whatever your honest review is. Thanks so much for listening to Single Soulmate.

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Hope you enjoyed this episode of Single to Soulmate! If you want to learn more about Johnny and Lara or want to start your own soulmate journey, go to johnnyandlara.com.