Have you considered you might be holding on to something that prevents you from finding your soulmate? What would you think you need to stop doing or change? It’s not freedom. You probably have not thought about this one key thing. Listen to this episode and learn what it is.

In this episode we talked about:
– What is holding you back from finding true love
– How giving up one thing can drastically improve your love life
– What you have to give up to have a fantastic relationship

READY TO MAKE A DRAMATIC CHANGE IN YOUR LOVE LIFE?

If you are ready to take action and control over you love life to find the man of your dreams go to http://bit.ly/SingleToSoulmate-Call to book a FREE call with Dr. Lara Fernandez herself to assess exactly what’s been holding you back in love, what is it you REALLY want, and how to get there as quickly as possible.

If you are a single professional woman ready to take action in your love life go to http://bit.ly/SingleToSoulmate-Call to book your FREE Love Breakthrough Clarity Call.

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Episode Transcription Start —>
S5EP16

Speaker1: [00:00:03] Hello and welcome to single The Soulmate Podcast where we help you, the love warrior or love word to be to go from single to with your soulmate. Living the life of your dreams. Hello and welcome to another love lesson. I am so happy to be here with you. So. What do you have to give up in order to have epic love, in order to have soulmate love, in order to have a thriving relationship with a healthy, high quality, commitment minded, marriage minded man? What do you need to give up in order to have that fantastic relationship? What do you need to give up in order to have it all? So let’s talk about that. For a lot of times, women who are just, you know, rocking and shocking in life, you get your career, your your your business, your, you know, your managing people, whatever the thing is that you’re that you’re doing. You don’t. Oh, you’re like, what else? Like, you’re you’re you’re going on vacation with your girlfriends, right? And and you’re kind of tired of going on vacation just with your girlfriends, right? You want to go on vacation with your man, so you don’t want to give up your freedom, right? You don’t want to give up your freedom. You want to be able to go on on let’s say on vacation. You want to be able to feel like you can still do what you want to do. Do you need to give up your freedom in order to to have it? All right, you got the the the finances, the career, the house, whatever.

Speaker1: [00:01:49] But this love life is your missing piece. Do you have to give up your freedom in order to have it all? No, that’s not it. Do you we mentioned your your career, your your professional success. Do you need to give that up in order to to have it all to have the man that matches your success in in the professional arena? You want to have that kind of success in your love life to do you need to give give that professional life up. No, actually, you don’t. Do you need to give up? Kind of like doing what you want in your life. No, you don’t need to give that up. But here’s the thing. For the high performing, high achieving, goal oriented, single professional woman who we work with, there is something that you need to give up and it’s something that you probably are not even holding on to in other areas of your life because you can’t be successful in other areas of your life. If you’re holding on to this one thing and here’s what it is, you got to give up the victimhood. You got to give up the the the victim way of thinking about your love life. You got to give up victimhood when it comes to men like, oh, he did this to me. That’s why everything is shit. You know, give up victimhood when it comes to your life.

Speaker1: [00:03:33] I understand. We understand that. When I say we am like our whole team. Me, Laura, our coach is like, we understand that you have been through hardships in your life, in your love life, had terrible things happen. We really do understand that now. I’m not saying that you have to somehow wave a magic wand and not have been a victim of things in the past, whether it be a victim of someone lying, cheating, stealing, or a victim of of crime of of variety of reasons abuse, neglect, rape. I mean, a lot of abuse happens and crimes are committed that someone is a victim of. What I’m talking about is giving up a victimhood way of thinking about your life going forward, meaning giving up a victim of being a victim, like having like victimhood thinking around men like I’m a victim of this man that men. All these men. I have to I’m a victim of of my life. I’m a victim in my my finances. I’m a victim in my health. The reality is, you’ve got to take control of your love life the same way you took control of other areas of your life, your your getting your degree rising up in your your career. You took control in those areas of your life. You started to think about what you can control. And people say, well, you know, I can’t control a man. I have to I don’t want to have to chase a man.

Speaker1: [00:05:22] Nobody’s talking about you chasing a man. When when I say you have to take control and you got to go for your dreams, and you think that you have to chase a man or go after man. All that reveals is that you’re completely clueless about how to really wield the power of feminine radiance. It simply means that it’s it’s absent from your understanding. It’s absent from your awareness, and therefore, it’s absent from your experience, meaning that you’re not exuding feminine radiance. You’re probably way too much in your masculine. And that’s why there’s no healthy, masculine, feminine dynamics that that is not a death sentence. Meaning like you’re not stamped with that for life. Like, I have brown hair, you know, until my hair turns gray. That is my reality. I have brown hair. And so it’s not like that. Like it is what it is. You know, what I’m saying is that that if you are finding that, you’re just thinking aggressively like, oh, I don’t want to have to chase a man. That means that your whole thinking process is more masculine oriented, which means it’s going to be virtually impossible for you to be feminine and like exude feminine radiance and be magnetic from a feminine standpoint because you haven’t taken control of this area of your life. And I don’t mean take control where you have to go and ask a bunch of guys dates the the love warriors which is our our clients our love warriors they become magnetic.

Speaker1: [00:07:08] And so you actually take control of what you can take control of and you are not chasing after guys by any stretch whatsoever. So you have to give up victimhood. You have to give up the idea that you have no control. You have to give up the idea that all the good ones are taking. How is it that our clients are meeting awesome guys right now and are every week, every month, regardless of what’s going on in the world? They’re meeting great guys, getting into relationships, getting engaged, getting married, having children. How is that? Is it now that all the good ones are taken so nobody else is going to be getting married this this month or forever? Right. I mean, you have to apply some logic to it. Of course, all the good ones aren’t taken, but you have to give up the victimhood way of thinking about this, like, oh, well, you know, I, you know, I’m just at the mercy of all these guys. You’re not at the mercy of all these guys at all. All that reveals is that you simply don’t know how to take control of what you can control. So when you don’t know how to do something, do you keep doing the same thing that you’ve been doing and trying to get better at it by doing the same thing you’ve been doing that reveals that you don’t know how to do something. This doesn’t make any sense, right? If you don’t know how to do something, you learn.

Speaker1: [00:08:41] If you don’t know how to play the piano and you keep listening to piano music and somehow that’s not helping you play the piano or you put a poster of a piano up, or you talk to your girlfriends about how to play the piano, and that doesn’t seem to be working. You go to someone who knows how to play the piano and knows how to teach you, because those are actually two different things. There are love coaches out there, dating coaches out there that are not in relationships themselves, not happily married, certainly not for, like Laura and I, two decades. And so they’re either not in a relationship, not married, but they’re going to teach you how to get married or they got lucky, but so they don’t really know how they did it or they know how they did it, but they don’t know how to teach you. Right. And these things are all different elements of the process. So you can have someone who knows how to play the piano really great, but they don’t really know how to teach it. And you and I, you have probably experienced some bad teachers in your life, right? Most of the time what that is, is someone who knows how to do the thing but doesn’t know how to teach it. That’s a separate skill, actually. And I’m fortunate in our clients seem to really appreciate that I have almost 20 years of experience in teaching.

Speaker1: [00:10:16] So it’s not just that I know how to do the thing, I know how to teach the thing. I’ve taught other teachers how to teach as back when I was in public schools. So knowing how to teach is a skill in and of itself. So Laura was very conscious and intentional in attracting me to her. She knows how she did it. We taught others. We now have coaches that also were taught by us, went through the love of their life path, learned everything they could from us, applied it in their life, attracted their husbands. They’re now husbands, they’re now happily married women. And they know exactly what they did because they followed our step by step plan to attract their husbands. And then we have taught them how to teach that to others. You simply can’t find that anyplace else. So if you want to learn how to play the piano, it would behoove you to go to someone who knows how to play the piano, knows how to teach someone how to play the piano, and is the best at doing it right. So that’s how we get better at something that we haven’t been good at in the past. So none of us, myself, Laura, our coaches are people that got lucky, you know, just woke up one day and found somebody and just got lucky. You know, it was very conscious, very intentional, had to learn step by step how to do that, how to change things from the past.

Speaker1: [00:11:46] So, look, if you are a goal oriented, single, professional woman who wants your love success to match your professional success, you’re going to want to learn how to be successful in this area. And the first step for that is to get on the phone with Laura. And you can talk professional woman to professional woman. Obviously, you’re a professional. And whatever professional, whatever you do, Laura is a professional at helping women find love, helping women get out of their own way, helping women to have it all. Because if you’re tired, like, you know, I mentioned before. We’re like, you going on vacations with your girlfriends and you’re tired of that. That can be changed. Not by complaining about it, but it can be changed. Not by reading another blog article. You’ve done that right for a long time, not by looking at how to flirt a certain way and stuff like that. By focusing on flirting and dating and not understanding what energy you’re even putting out, how you are giving away who you really are, what messages you’re sending to to men, what messages you’re not sending to men. If you’re not focusing on the foundation first before you even get to that other stuff, none of those little tips and tricks are going to make any difference to just not because the, the, the, the energy that you’re putting out, the foundation that you’re laying, that you’re trying to build on is is shaky, nonexistent, absent, broken, dysfunctional, wrong, bad, whatever word you want to use.

Speaker1: [00:13:32] If you’re looking at how to get better at something, get on the phone with Laura. Have her do a love breakthrough clarity, call with you. And it’s about getting clear on a couple of things or a few things, like first, what is it that’s been stopping you? Because, look, it’s not that you’re like a bad person. It’s not that you’re a dumb person. It’s that something has been stopping you. And if you knew what that was, you would have already solved it already, right? If you knew what that was. So what is it that’s stopping you? Second, where do you want to go? What do you really want? Right. Because you can’t hit a target if you don’t know what it is. You’re a goal oriented person. You wanted to get that promotion. You had to think about that promotion. And then you had to get a roadmap, a plan for doing it, and then you had to go for it. Not some day you had to go for it now because you didn’t want to get the promotion in 20 years. You want to get the promotion as soon as possible. You don’t want to meet your husband in 20 years. It’s already been 20 years or ten years or three years, right? Longer than what you want. So you want to do it now. So you get clarity about where you’ve been, what’s been stopping you, where you want to go, and then how to get there as quickly as possible.

Speaker1: [00:14:58] Following a plan. Maybe the plan is to work with us, but maybe it’s not. That’s okay. But you have to show up and be willing to be honest about what it is that you want and be of the mindset that where you’re at right now sucks. You’re single and you don’t want to be again. Does that mean you’re a bad person? No. Does that mean you hate everything in your life? No. You’ve got a lot of good things in your life. But you’re missing having someone to share these good things with. You’re missing having someone to share the burdens with. Maybe you’re a single mom and you’re tired of trying to father and mother your kids and do everything. A good man would help with that. Maybe you’re tired of making all the decisions yourself and everything in your life. A good man who would help you with that. Right. And so if that is where you’re at, then you’re going to want to get on the phone and and have a little breakthrough clarity call. Get clear on those things where you’ve been, what’s been stopping you, where you want to go and how you can get there as quickly as possible. And Laura and you will have an honest, raw, real conversation. Don’t like come to it to just chit chat with a girlfriend. You could do that with your girlfriend.

Speaker1: [00:16:22] And also, look, the the calls are about an hour to 2 hours. Most of them are about an hour, but sometimes takes it as much as 2 hours. Once you book the call, you’ll need to fill out a quick form. If you don’t have 2 minutes to fill out the form after you book it, you don’t have time for an hour to two hour on your call. So your call, our assistant is going to cancel your call if you don’t fill out that form. Because in order for Laura to show up and serve you best, she really needs to know what’s going on. Where your head’s at. What it is you’re wanting. And it’ll take you a couple of minutes to fill out the form. And so you’ve got to take a few minutes to do that. But here’s another thing you want to think about. If you don’t have a couple of minutes to fill out a form or an hour or two to get on the phone, you don’t really have time for a relationship, and it’s just not that high of a priority. And that’s perfectly fine. But it’s good to know, like, why is it that it’s not happening? Because it’s just not that high of a priority. And this is the first step that you can take now. It’s the first step that you can take. Not that this is the first day that you’ve had the idea of, Hey, I’d like to meet my soulmate, get married, have true love, marriage, family, all that.

Speaker1: [00:17:33] But it’s the first step on moving up to another level, right? Like because you’re going to release victimhood of like, oh, I’m just a victim of circumstances here and you’re going to start to take control of your love life the way you have in every other area of your life that you have been successful. If there’s other areas of your life where you haven’t been that successful, one of the things that will be missing is taking control of the situation. Again, don’t know how to play the piano. You can whine about it, complain about it, talk about how pianos are hard to come by and all this type of stuff that the bottom line is you haven’t learned how to play the piano from somebody who knows how to play the piano and knows how to teach you. You want to learn how to attract your soulmate. That’s what we’ve been doing for 15 years. If you see behind me, if you’re watching, you see behind me, there’s a whole bunch of photos on the wall there. That’s just a few of our happily married clients who found their guy. Got married are living great lives because they got clear that if I don’t know how to do something, I can learn how to do that. So you’ve already learned how to do love the way you’ve been doing it, and it’s not really meeting up to your standards.

Speaker1: [00:18:48] Give up the victimhood and go for your dreams. If you’re listening to this, there’ll be a link there as well in the in the show notes or something. Okay, bye for now. Hey, thanks for tuning into today’s episode. If you’re a single professional woman who wants your success in your love life to match your success in your career, and you’re looking to get crystal clear right now about why Truelove hasn’t been knocking on your door and how to have that happen sooner rather than later. Like, not literally, though, that would be weird, but I hope you know what I’m saying. Anyway, you’re going to want to book a call, a love breakthrough clarity call right now with my dear wife, Dr. Laura. Yes. Laura herself will get on the phone or Skype with you one on one to assess exactly what’s been holding you back and love what it is you really want and how to get there as quickly as possible. Just go to single soulmate dot com forward slash call to book a call that’s single to soulmate dot com forward slash call for free love breakthrough clarity call. That is for you if and only if you’re a single professional woman who is as serious about her love life right now as you’ve been about getting your degree or your career success. So again, that’s single soulmate dot com forward slash call to book your life changing love. Breakthrough Clarity. Call right away.

Episode Transcription End —>

Hope you enjoyed this episode of Single to Soulmate! If you want to learn more about Johnny and Lara or want to start your own soulmate journey, go to johnnyandlara.com.