Some things in life really are just a matter of time. But is that the case with love? Do you just need to keep doing what you’re doing and love will come? Find out the honest truth in this episode.

WHAT YOU WILL LEARN:

– How much time you ACTUALLY need to find your soulmate

– What determines how long you’ll be waiting for true love

– When soulmate love will come for you (this one is surprising!)

WANT TO UNDERSTAND YOURSELF IN JUST 2 MINUTES BETTER?

After over 17 years of helping hundreds of women find their soulmates, we’ve identified 5 different Love Patterns, each with different characteristics that can keep you from finding true love.

Find what your Love Pattern is and what to do about it by taking our free, 2-minute quiz. Just go to https://singletosoulmate.com/quiz , discover your Love Pattern, and learn what changes you can make starting TODAY.

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Episode Transcription Start —>
S6EP84

Speaker1: [00:00:03] Hello and welcome to Single to Soulmate podcast where we help you the Love Warrior or a love word to be to go from single to with your soulmate Living the life of your dreams. Plenty of time. I just have to wait until, let’s see, until COVID is over. Then I’ll. Then I’m going to be ready for love. Or I just you know, I’ve got this big project at work. I just need to wait until this project is done or I’m selling my house. I just need to wait until I sell my house or I’m buying a house. I just need to wait until I buy a house. Look, there are a lot of people that went to bed last night and didn’t wake up today, but they went to bed last night thinking that they had more time. And that’s just real life. And here’s another thing. There’s a lot of people that are ten years older than you that wish they had started today, making their love life a higher priority than they have been. And women come to us when their love life is a high priority. There are other aspects of their life are going well. They have a career. They have a profession. They have things together in their life. But this is something missing. But here’s the thing. Everybody, as human beings, all of us want to keep doing the things that we feel comfortable and confident about and don’t really scare us that much.

Speaker1: [00:01:38] We want to keep doing those things. But if you want to keep doing the things that you’re comfortable, confident about and don’t really scare you, then keep living a single life because you’re you’re well practiced in that. But if you want to find love, you have to give up the idea that only doing things that you’re comfortable with and feel confident about and stuff like that is the way to go. You’re not going to find your dream man if you’re uncomfortable talking to guys that you really like. You’re not confident talking to guys that are awesome, but you’re very comfortable and confident talking with guys who you don’t really want to be with. Right. How can you get more confident? Right. That’s really what we work on is how can you get more confident? That’s what you need to be considering. How can you become more confident? And just like anything in life. Confidence comes from competence. In other words, if you’re not competent in something, you’re not going to feel that confident in that. Now, sure, you can puff, you know, puff out your chest and act like you’re confident and basically like people say, fake it until you make it. Yeah, but generally speaking, that doesn’t work very well. Right? Imagine the person who’s like gets a new car and they’re like, Oh, I don’t know how to drive a car. I had a friend. I drove motorcycles when I was younger and I had a friend who had a lot more money than me and he bought a really, really fancy motorcycle, but he didn’t know how to ride.

Speaker1: [00:03:11] And he thought just because he had the motorcycle, he would be able to ride it. And he crashed a few times. He eventually ended up selling it because he never learned how to ride. The thing that he got that basically just landed on his lap and his approach to life was, I’m just going to like, buy my way into that and you might be able to fake it to you, make it in some areas of life, but you cannot fake it till you make it in this area of life. How do you know that? Look at your results. Look at the last ten years of your life. Are your relationships getting better and better and better where you have guys that are awesome, guys that are basically fighting over you and you’re just choosing between this guy who’s awesome and that guy is awesome. If that’s not the case, then you’re like my friend who’s like, Maybe you got a motorcycle, but you don’t know how to ride it and you’re not getting prepared for it, you know? So if you’re putting off getting more serious about this area of your life, you may be doing it because you’re simply waiting until it becomes less comfortable or until it becomes more comfortable.

Speaker1: [00:04:21] And here’s the reality. It’s not going to be more comfortable. You have to get out of your comfort zone and try something different. Right? Working with us in an advanced program and having mentorship and coaches and guidance and stretching yourself and facing the areas where you’re basically going the wrong way down a one way street. It’s going to be a little confronting, not in a disrespectful way, not in a mean way, but you’re going to discover that there is actually an answer to why you haven’t been able to attract the guy of your dreams after all of these years of wishing for it, wanting for it, and like taking a break and working on yourself. This is this is again, this is like going back to one of the other myths. This is like the broke person who’s asking their broke friend how to get wealthy. You yourself have been steering this ship of finding love for quite some time. And if you’re not where you want to be, maybe you need to let someone else give you some guidance. It’s like everybody makes fun of of guys who drive around and don’t want to get directions and don’t ask for any feedback. But clearly they’re lost. Why? Because they’re ego. Because they don’t want to have to confront the fact that they don’t really know where they’re going. But what are smart people? Do They flip on GPS and they say, you know what? Tell me where to go.

Speaker1: [00:05:48] And if I make a wrong turn, reroute me and put me on the path to the right path. That takes an emotionally mature ego. It’s a it’s a less mature ego to say, I’ve got it even when clearly you are lost because it doesn’t make you a bad person, that you’re driving around an unfamiliar place and you’re lost. But it does make you someone who’s maybe not the brightest person to say, I’m lost, but I got it. It makes you a person who’s more attached to your ego than to getting the results. And if getting the results. Let’s talk about love. If the results you want are to find true love, marriage, family, a high quality man, a high quality relationship, a a emotionally mature, commitment minded man who wants marriage just as much as you and you don’t feel confident and competent and able to attract that, then it’s time to set that scared part of you aside and allow yourself to flip on that. G.p.s. And be guided toward the destination. It’ll save you time, it’ll save you energy, it’ll save you money to do that. And so don’t believe that that fifth myth that you have plenty of time, because the truth is, whatever age you are, there are women ten years older than you wishing that they had started at your age. And you know who’s going to be the next woman like that.

Speaker1: [00:07:19] You if you don’t do something about it right now, today. There’s a saying there’s a Chinese proverb that the the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The next best time is today. You simply do not have the time that you think you have. You can’t wait until. Cynthia. Yeah. Best decision I’ve ever made. Because Cynthia decided today is a date. Even though this area of my life, this thing that I want to work on, I could keep working on that. I got this project at work. My career needs this or whatever going on. My family, whatever is going on in your life. Today is the day to make the decision to change the direction that you’re going and flip on that. A lot of our clients, Cynthia and others, decide that, you know what, having Johnny and Laura and the team of coaches helping me is like having GPS taking me where I want to go. So don’t be like the guy who’s driving around saying, I got it, I got it, honey. Even though he’s clearly lost. Right. Be the person who’s asked for directions and then takes the directions so you can get where you want to go faster because you’re already burning time. You’re already burning money like it costs you more to live as a single woman. Every year that you delay, it’s costing you money from sad spending to retail therapy to just rent or mortgage on a home that could fit two people.

Speaker1: [00:08:54] I’m not saying that you you go for love just to save money. I’m just saying if you think you’re going to save money by waiting longer, you’re simply not looking at logic. You’re burning money, you’re burning time, you’re burning heartache because you’re not like a robot. Every time your your your hopes rise and fall and you pick another dud or you get taken advantage of, it hurts your heart. What about the times you sleep with someone who you think is special, but they turn out to be just playing you. It hurts your heart and that’s just being real. You know, this idea that women can just sleep around just like men do. Come on, that’s not real, you know? So, like your heart, you have to value your heart. Like your heart getting hurt every time you think someone’s special and they’re not, and they’re just playing you, that hurts your heart. Well, value your heart. Flip on that GPS and get some direction so that that doesn’t happen to you again, you know? So. Okay, so that’s myth number five. You don’t have the time. And look, if you want to have a family, you don’t have infinite amount of time to do that right now. Maybe you want to have a family where you’re blending your kids or child with his kids or child or something like that. That’s fine. But is it still your kids need to have like a role model in the home for fatherhood masculinity? How does a man treat a woman? How does a gentleman treat a lady? How are they going to get that? By watching TV? Heck no.

Speaker1: [00:10:32] By watching movies. Heck no. By listening to music. Heck no. They need to have a man in the home now. Of course, it’s better to have a good man in the home than a bad man in the home. This is obvious, though, isn’t it? It’s obvious. So you want to give your self the opportunity and give your kids the opportunity because your kids are what, five, ten, 12, 15, whatever. Like they don’t have infinite time to have a father in the home. So instead of using your kids as like a reason not to prioritize your love life, use your kids as a reason to prioritize your love life because they don’t have infinite time, right? They’re getting their blueprint for love, marriage, relationships. They’re getting it right now from you. So what are they getting from you? Wait to have your dreams come true. Wait to be trampled on in relationships and hope it works out different in the future. Someday. You probably don’t want that for your kids, right? So you don’t have infinite time just because none of us know how much time we have. So the time to do the things that really matter to us is today, regardless of what society tells you.

Speaker1: [00:11:43] Because I know society tells you you should wait until you get this next promotion. You should wait until you’re out of debt. You should wait until you have less debt. You should wait until you own the house or the bigger house or get this car. I know society is telling you that, but most people in society end up unhappy in life y because they didn’t prioritize love and relationships when they could have. Instead, they wait till they’re much older and then they go, Well, it didn’t work out for me. I mean, you can wait if you want to do that, but I encourage you to make love and relationships a higher priority now, because then your whole life, the next ten, 20, 30, 50 years of your life can be dramatically different. Thank you for joining us on Single to Soulmate. And listen, if you’re ready to move your life forward in a significant way, you’re going to want to check out our brand new masterclass. We’re giving you the five step game plan that you need to go from single to soulmate. All you have to do is go to singletosoulmate.com/call forward slash learn that Single to Soulmate dotcom forward slash l e a r n learn and sign up for the masterclass. You’ll get a 24 hour exclusive pass to to watch that and learn your five steps to go from single to soulmate faster than you ever thought possible. Enjoy.

Episode Transcription End —>

Hope you enjoyed this episode of Single to Soulmate, brought to you by Feminine Radiance and Courage Institute! If you want to learn more about Johnny and Lara or want to start your own soulmate journey, go to johnnyandlara.com.